Published On: Mon, Nov 26th, 2018

Reigniting the Relationship Flame

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A comfortable long term relationship is something to be treasured. It is stable and there is an ultimate level of comfort that is shared between both partners. However, human nature can sometimes cause that comfort to cause an otherwise untroubled relationship to seem stale. At times the relationship may feel stagnant or stuck in a rut. Many couples will fall into a boring regular routine of staying at home to watch T.V. or rented movies in sweatpants and an old t-shirt, no less. This is hardly the stuff of romance. Where did all the excitement of the first few months run off to?

Reigniting the Relationship Flame

Many relationships may even end prematurely because one (or both partners) will search outside of their relationship for excitement and the feeling of butterflies. The best way to avoid feeling trapped within a relationship is to make an effort to make it exciting and fun, thus increasing intimacy. So how can one make a five year or even a 20 year relationship feel brand new again? Here are some ideas and methods couples can utilize in order to reignite the flame of relationship bliss and to fall in love all over again.

Learn a New Skill Together

Learning new things together will make the whole relationship seem less mundane. Learning a new skill such as salsa dancing, archery, rock climbing, or maybe even horseback riding can add excitement to a relationship. Think outside the box. Ideally, it should be a skill that neither person in the relationship has any prior experience with. This way, the skill will be considered a completely novel and bonding element to the relationship. It will cause both partners in the relationship to lean on each other to help in the learning process.

Have a Real Date

Every couple needs to take time out for themselves and have a real date. A real date is not simply eating out somewhere with the kids at a loud family restaurant. It should be an event that is very adult centered ( this means child-free) and reminiscent of the first few dates of the relationship. The choice of location is dependent on each couple’s specific personality. If a couple really enjoys music, then they may try to make the date involve a concert or seeing a local band play live at a bar. If a couple enjoys wine, then they could go to a wine-tasting or enjoy a romantic dinner out.

Both partners should also make an effort to look their best for the date, and remind the other why they fell in love in the first place. This means no sweat pants or ratty jeans – no matter comfortable they may seem. Sexy attire is completely encouraged. Setting aside a set time each month (or each week, if lucky) to re-connect as lovers will go a long way to increase intimacy within a relationship.

Leave Love Notes

Words of meaning can resonate forever. These words can be in the form of a text-message, an email, or something as simple as a Post-it. It should be spontaneous, out of the blue; just something special that will remind the other person that they are being thought of fondly and with love. The notes can be endearing or they can be something funny to brighten up the other person’s day.

Laugh Together

Laughter can strengthen and re-enforce the bond that long-term relationships already have. Life is full of responsibility and endless laundry lists of things to do. Laughter lowers blood pressure and reduces stress. Go out to see a funny movie together, watch a comedy show, or get other couples that share a great sense of humour together to play fun and engaging games like Charades or Pictionary. The sillier and more childish the game, the better the chances of laughter. Couples can be teamed up to work together and establish new connections.

Communication and creativity are the basis of what will keep a long term relationship fresh and enjoyable. It does not matter how long a couple has been together, they can always find out new things about each other; and if not that, they can always learn about new things in the world together. Once novelty and excitement is able to be infused within an already committed relationship, then it becomes entirely probable that relationships can last forever.

About the Author

- Paul Linus is an eminent online journalist who has been writing news, features and editorials on different websites from across the world for about a decade. He can be contacted at

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